Showing posts from December, 2021

S T R E A M # 5

Ok, so, there’s a dog with a knife in the backyard. He’s holding the neighbor hostage. He wants bigger bones to bury – the dog does. And the neighbor happens to have big bones. That’s the claim he’s made, anyway, that he’s a “big boned” man. (Rather than fat.) I don’t want to give the dog bigger bones. He’s only half-buried the medium-sized bones I’ve tossed out. So I think the dog is being a snot-nosed scumbag. Well, he’s not really a scumbag. He’s a cute pooch. But he may well be snot-nosed – a spoiled snot-nosed pooch. And I can relate. My stepfather thinks I’m spoiled and snot-nosed – and I do blow my nose quite a bit. So I can relate to the dog – but only up to a point. Although I am hairy, I am not canine. I have no tail to wag. But the dog is being irrational. I, too, am often irrational. That said, I would never hold a knife to anybody’s throat. At least not in any premeditated sense. I don’t dig that sort of behavior. Too much guilt involved. Violent behavior results in guil

Forlorn Cacti

For your amusement (or disgust), please find hereunder a recent exchange of text messages...   MA :  U left you’re plants [plant emoji] their worried [frowny emoji]  ME :  What makes you think they’re worried?  MA :  Because they said  ME :  What makes you think they’re sad?  [She sends a photo of a potted baby cactus and a potted baby succulent sitting on a window sill.]  MA :  Because they’re looking out the window for you  ME :  How do you know they’re not facing you?  MA :  Because they said,  “where’s [FireVaney]?”  Did u forget them?  ME :  They’re TALKING?!  MA :  Did u  ME :  They’ve never spoken to me.  MA :  Why of course  ME :  They must like you more.  MA :  Did u forget them?  I told them u can go home tomorrow  ME :  Well they just sent me this text: “On second thought, we’d like to stay.”  MA :  Really  ME :  Cacti are very tech savvy.  MA :  You’ll have to apologize forgetting them  ME :  But they said, via text, that they want to stay.  MA :  U don’t want them  Now the