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The blue scale in the bathroom, the one that’s been there all your life, it was off by three pounds. This was this morning this was. Even after adjusting its small black knob, it’s still off. The dial-thingy should’ve stopped spinning at 135. The thin red line over the clear plastic shield should’ve cut right through the 3 of 135.

So, you jumped.
Which, once the dial-thingy stopped spinning, didn’t change anything.

So you jumped, again. And you jumped higher.

Now, anyone who steps on that old blue scale, they weigh in at 270. Even before you step on it, that’s what you are—the thin red line cutting through the 7 of 270 telling you so.

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